Trash

It hurts me whenever you give the 'It's over' ultimatum.  Not once did I ever think about giving it all up because of some silly argument.  I find that it's so easy for you to say that you can do away with me.  It's unfair.  No matter how much you've hurt me, I could never say that.  At the end of the day, I worry that eventually, you'll realize i'm not worth keeping.  I'm only temporary.  Dispensable.

Subliminal

If you ever considered that eventually, we'll fall apart,

Could it be that it's your subconscious telling you 

You've given up?

Pansamantala

I started to be guilty
Of not trusting your 'forever'
On the day I realized
You wanted this to be over.

When I don't miss you, you make me feel guilty about it.
When I do miss you, you shrug it off and make me feel
so damn unimportant.

What a girl wants

I don't need to be pampered;
I need only to be cared for.

I don't need to be worshiped;
I need only to be loved.

I don't need to be a goddess;
I need only be your equal.

I don't need to be treated more;
But I need to not be treated less.

I don't need you to give me what I want;
But I wish you'd give me what I need.

Anger Management

Okay.  So today, the company i'm currently interning in conducted this Anger Management Seminar.  I was really interested to join because...

1. I aspire to be a Psychologist, and I think this could help me with my Psych Future.
2. I am surrounded by volatile and violently angry people.  It could help me how to deal with them.

Needless to say, the seminar was very informative.  I never thought it could also affect me (because apparently, ignoring one's anger is bad.  Ignoring my own anger is what I usually do when I'm upset or angry.)

Buuuuuut then again, something else happened.

There's someone in my current workplace whom I have had a falling out with.  This guy apparently decides to erase me in his life.  I don't need to explain myself, or our argument.  I don't want to point fingers at anybody, including myself.  I could be in the wrong, or he could be in the wrong.

Now.  This guy decides to ask a question.  He wonders about if a certain person would be upfront rude to him, and seems to be a person who is 'hopeless'.

Now, I can't help but think that he was referring to me.  First and foremost, I heard from other people that it is his style to make another person feel guilty if he feels as if he has been faulted.  Second of all, one always knows if dirt is being flung on him on her.  IDK.  Maybe I read too much into it, but whatever.

I just wanted to say that I am not one to hold grudges.  I have forgiven and forgotten our falling out a long time ago.  I am ready to patch things up with this guy, but I don't want to make the first move.  I don't want to try and make contact, then be treated badly.  It is awkward and embarrassing, and I want to save myself from the experience.

We ignore each other, however, I have been noticing that he is started to acknowledge my presence by giving me a certain look.  This morning, I even went as far as smiling to the group he was with, and yes, I also acknowledged him.

He returned the smile by giving me the daggers look.

I am not mad. <.<  It seems like he is.  From the seminar, it was said that one should let another person calm down before approaching them.

Wellp.  They're the experts.  I'd rather not do anything for now.

If you find me a burden or a nuisance
Just tell me.
I'll let you
Let me go.